Random Stuff
by erickdragon101
Summary: My oneshots, poems, and songfics. Probably much better than before, with a tribute to a loved author.
1. I Just Can't

To all the spazzes: Ok, when I say Random Stuff, I mean RANDOM STUFF! I know I changed the name, so here's what I mean. That was a random vent poem (thanks to all those who enjoyed it), and this is some random Sly/Carm. There may be some random Kyle/Melanie, or Vinny/Jenny ahead too. No, this does not stall production of Stalker II. SO GET OFF MY BACK ALREADY! Thank you.

This segment is called "I just can't." Rated T Drama/Romance

It was the usual for a Sly Cooper heist. He broke in, he stole, and he ran away. But fate has a strange sense of humor.

"Get back here, Cooper!" Carmelita's yells rent through the air, as well as the blasts of her shock pistol.

"You'll have to do better than that Carmelita." Sly yelled back as he easily dodged each and every shot. He had just finished heist, and as we all know, he loves to flirt with the Inspector.

"You know, I've told you before that that shock pistol really matches the color of your eyes, very fetching." Sly yelled before avoiding another wave of shock pistol rounds.

Carmelita shivered at his compliment. She hated when he did that. She hated when he made her fell like the only woman in the world. It just made her job of capturing him even harder.

Sly ran along the rooftops unaware of the plans fate had for him this night. He just ran on the rooftops, until he stepped on a loose shingle. Normally, a loose shingle wouldn't have bothered Sly at all, but this one was worse. The shingle slipped and twisted his ankle until he heard a sharp…

CRACK!

Sly slid down of the roof in agony, putting out his arms to stop the fall. He hit the ground, and one of his arms twisted completely.

CRACK!

Sly now lay on the ground, his arm and ankle broken. There was a throbbing pain in his head, and a burning pain all through the rest off his body. Carmelita caught up with the all but paralyzed raccoon in moments. She leapt from the roof, and landed squarely in front of Sly.

Being in his position, Sly did the only thing he could, beg. "Please Carmelita" he pleaded.

Carmelita stood above him, her shock pistol aimed down at him. She saw the tears in his eyes, his deep brown eyes. "No Carmelita, you've waited five years for this moment. You can't chicken out now." She told herself, unable to pull the trigger, no matter how hard she told herself too, she couldn't. She just couldn't do it, she just couldn't.

"Why? Why can't I do it?

Am I afraid, afraid to love?

All these years, it's been in front of me,

And I never noticed a thing.

All these years, all of these years

Afraid." Carmelita couldn't help but think it. She couldn't help the tears that flowed down her cheeks, darkening her fur.

The Cooper van came swerving into the parking lot. Bentley and Murray jumped out, they couldn't leave him. As Bentley did his best to get Sly in the van, Murray got right in front of Carmelita. His voice sounded distant, and the world had gone swaying and blurry.

"You can take me, but you can't take Sly!" Murray yelled. Carmelita felt the shock pistol slip from her hands, and saw the earth come closer until all was black.

Carmelita woke up from her black out on a couch in the middle of a living room. She didn't know where and she didn't know how. All of sudden, her memory returned, Sly bleeding on the ground, and pleading with her. She felt tears coming back to her eyes, and curled up as they came. She was afraid, she'd always been afraid. She couldn't help it.

Out of nowhere came a comforting hand on her shoulder. She looked up, to see Sly standing above her, a worried look etched upon his features. Carmelita couldn't help this either. "Oh Sly" She wailed as she hurled her self upon him.

Sly, quick to recover from shock (and boy was he), returned her embrace allowing himself to gently brush her cheek with his hand. She was, and always had been the strongest person he knew. But, she bottled up her weaknesses, and at some point, anything in a bottle has to come out.

Well, that was it. Kind of a missing ending, but I'll probably continue with it…eventually.


	2. War

War is a terrible thing. So just read.

War Rated T Drama

The dawn has risen red,

Just as the visions in my head.

The guns have fired in the night,

In this the day of our plight.

We have lost our way,

In the darkness before day.

Our blood rains from the sky,

Our tears streak cross the ground.

The wisest wonder why,

The foolish wonder how.

But should we let the trap still close?

Should we let the trap still pry?

Should we follow each others blows?

Should we not but try?

Our own graves we have dug too deep,

In the dirt our blood is forced to seep.

We now lay wounded in the trench,

With no drink our thirst to quench.

In this dark a shadow blurs,

The thief runs on the prowl.

He runs for riches,

While our blood thirst howls.

I ask him who is he,

Who takes advantage of what is to be.

He turns so I can see,

"They took advantage of me."


	3. The Wedding

Well, another sort of random thing. I love randomness. Anyway, hope you like, although I know some won't.

The Wedding Rated T Action/Adventure/Romance

Here everyone was at the wedding of the century. Master thief Sly Cooper was to be wed, in holy matrimony, to Inspector Carmelita Fox. About twelve fellow inspectors, her chief, eight assistants, and her whole family had fainted when the news reached them. Yes, it all seemed very surprising.

The day had long since been determined, as well as everyone's thoughts that this was not meant to be. In fact, about fourteen inspectors had a plan to ambush the wedding with SWAT team members and catch Sly. But that happens at the end, so here's the now.

Sly slowly marched his way to the altar, which seemed a million miles away, a million miles of hateful glances, whispers, and fear. Upon reaching the altar, he looked back at the crowd. The still hateful crowd still seemed to glare at him as though he was on trial. The church seemed to shrink and dim, but just then the flower girls came, as closely pursued by Carmelita and her father, who was smiling surprisingly enough.

Brightness flooded the church, and Carmelita smiled as a beacon of radiance in the dark. Time slowed as Carmelita approached and came to stand beside Sly. The priest began to speak, but his words were lost upon Sly, who was entranced by the beauty standing before him. Then the question came, "Carmelita, do you take Sly to be your lawfully wedded husband, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?"

This is the point where time should have stopped, but it didn't. Instead, several inspectors stood, and called out. Caterers, and some of the guests pulled out guns, SWAT teams poured in from every entrance possible, and shock pistols went off at the groom. Had it not been for all the men invading the place, they might have hit. But as it turned out, the southern SWAT team headed straight for the groom, and were mostly taken out by the inspectors from the crowd. The southern team ran into the one from the west, and they started shooting tazers and tear gas before anyone noticed they were all SWAT members. The eastern squad ended up exchanging fire with the guests and caterers, luckily tazers and not bullets. The squad hiding in the cellar fired tear gas and came out to find Sly with gas masks, but got lost in the rest of the confusion. In fact, only Inspector Rowles had a real gun, and happened to be the only man to hit Sly. However, the injury was in the arm, and before the situation was straightened out, Murray, being the best man as no one thought they should give him the rings, was able to grab the priest, the best woman, and Sly and get out. Bentley got outside thanks to a few sleeping gas bombs, and Carmelita was out almost immediately after the SWAT teams came.

But the wedding went on, for as Sly sat panting on the ground, he heard the one voice he wanted to hear say the one thing he wanted to hear. "I do." The priest was able to respond, after straitening himself out, "Sly, do you tale Carmelita to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?"

"I do" Sly almost whispered the words.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride, and someone better get me some scotch!" The disgruntled priest yelled.

They kissed, and then everyone ran to the van as inspectors made it outside and started shooting.

The End

The morale of the story is: you can hate all you want, but love cannot be torn down, if it is truly there. The same can be said for friendship, and free will.


	4. TTWS

This is a tribute to Winged Sense, as I completely screwed up her ever returning to the site. I'm sorry to all of you who enjoyed her works as much as I did.

A Tribute Too Winged Sense Rated K General

Ode to Carmen,

Dressed in red.

That old raccoon,

With a cap on his head.

Ode to the cane,

That glowed and twirled.

Ode to Winged sense,

A great writing girl.

Her writing was just,

Her characters great,

But then this war,

Was put on her plate.

Ode to Felix,

The cat that we loved.

Ode to her writing,

Which was high above.

Me and myself,

Flourished no pride.

When that author's

Great spirit died.

We owe her a thanks,

An apology, too.

Winged Sense,

we'll dearly miss you.

She left but one message,

I encourage you to read.

She left in her profile,

Something to see.


End file.
